Tag: child abuse

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Lower the age of consent?

When law people go crazy, or just get lazy.

A twitter friend today sent me an article from the paper, and as I read it, my jaw literally dropped, and I may have even let out an audible gasp. Go read the article, then come back here for my rant…

In the aftermath of the Jimmy Savile scandal, and with Operation Yewtree in full swing, Britain is finally standing up and going after a whole bunch of people who were previously untouchable. Which is awesome. Just because you’re famous doesn’t mean that you should be above the law.

However, one woman, British Barrister Barbara Hewson, thinks that it’s just a witch hunt, and the better thing to do would be to simply lower the age of consent to 13 and we should get rid of the anonymity for victims. There should also be a statute of limitations, and most of these pedobears should only be charged with a misdemeanor.

So I’m wondering if she is just lazy, or has no clue of the impact of sexual assault on it’s victims. I’m hoping she’s just lazy, and thinks that all these “old cases” are just taking up her valuable time, which she could be doing something more important to her.

A lot of people simply don’t understand the impact of sexual assault on victims. Some people are able to heal from the trauma. Others are just really good at hiding how hurt they are. Some people openly have problems, but most people don’t know why a person is that way.

Assault actually has physical changes on the brain. It can change the way people deal with life. It can affect all their future interactions with society.I wish more people would look into the physical and emotional effects of assault before they start spouting off bullshit like this barrister did.

Does she truly believe that serial offenders like Jimmy Savile should have been allowed to get away with it “because they’re old”? Just because someone has gotten away with a crime for 20 or 30 or even 50 years, doesn’t mean they should be pardoned. The victims have had to live with the effects of that abuse their whole life, while the pedo was out and about, enjoying life. I don’t care if a child rapist is 90 years old. If he committed a crime, he shouldn’t get to go to the grave a free man. He should face his crimes the same as if he’d been brought to prosecution a day after the event.

I’m also tired of people pardoning pedophiles simply because they’re in the entertainment industry. People like Roman Polanski are still happily working, and all these people keep jumping to his defense, because even though he drugged, raped and sodomized a 13 year old girl, he’s an artiste, so it’s ok. Even though he was charged, then fled the country to avoid jail time, and has managed to avoid extradition a number of times, people still want to work with him. I just don’t get it. You couldn’t get me in the same room as that man. I won’t watch any of his films. I certainly wouldn’t work with him. I remember an interview with Kate Winslet saying that when Roman Polaski asks you to be in his film, you don’t say no. I so wish I had been there so I could say, Why, because he wouldn’t listen if you said no anyway?

Old men of the entertainment industry, you have been put on notice. You are no longer safe. All of us are getting strong and taking back our souls. If you did bad things to kids, you’re probably going to get a knock on the door.

Right now, it’s Britain leading the way, and Australia is doing pretty damn good too. There’s a lot of former child stars, and current working ones in the US who are watching these cases very closely. It won’t be long before there’s a lot of arrests in Hollywood. Unfortunately, for the older people, there is a statute of limitations in the US. However, for the younger kids who are currently living it, they’ll know that the older actors and execs are no longer untouchable. They’ll find their voices, and they’ll start to speak out.

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Jerry Sandusky on NBC

What the Hell are NBC thinking giving a Pedophile airtime?

Jerry Sandusky, the Penn State coach who is currently serving a 30 – 60 year prison sentence for RAPING young boys, is getting an exclusive “In His Own Words” on NBC on Monday morning.

Who the hell thought it would be a good idea to give Jerry airtime? Why are we letting a convicted child molester go on air, to give “his side” of the story? Has NBC given any consideration to his victims, or the millions of other survivors of abuse and wondered what the impact of seeing this monster on air could do to them? I’m guessing he’s not going to go on air and admit he’s a dirty pedo and he’s deeply sorry for all the pain and suffering he’s caused.

People like him think they’ve done nothing wrong. All this interview is going to do is trigger a lot of people. It’s going to cause great distress. In the midst of the other rape cases going on now, especially the Steubenville case, where people are blaming the victim, this interview is just going to show people once again that as long as you’re some kind of sports hero, or famous person, or have the upper hand socially over your victims, you’ll still be loved and lauded, and the victims will remain in the shadows, taunted, scared and re victimized.

Why don’t some of the networks do some interviews showing the impacts of abuse. Show some documentaries of the effects of trauma. How it deeply impacts people for the rest of their lives. How it can effect all their life choices. Instead of giving a voice to this deeply perverted man who took the innocence of so many young men, why not help the cause. Help bring forth change. Stop contributing to the rape culture.

I’m ashamed of you NBC. I won’t be watching. I hope my friends will also tell NBC they won’t be watching.

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A Law Unto Himself

John Laws and Betty Wilson

Are you fucking kidding me?

I’m sorry, but I’m really pissed off right now. At what point does someone think it’s OK to ask a person who was sexually molested if they were provocative as a six year old? When a caller rings you, crying, you don’t ask them a series of increasing demeaning questions. You don’t insinuate that it might be their fault. A SIX year old doesn’t flirt, they don’t bat their eyelids, they don’t invite people to touch them. They certainly don’t want men groping them, or getting their kicks from them. They don’t want a sick old man getting his jollies by touching them or molesting them.

If you, John Laws, think that a child somehow led men on so that they would molest her, then you need some serious help.

Please don’t compare this old man to Kyle Sandilands. I know everyone loves to keep bringing up the lie detector incident. However, and I’ve fought with many people over this, I don’t think Kyle was at fault in that incident at all. The mother of that child KNEW her daughter had been raped. She knew her daughter was in pain. But that bitch took her on air, and made her do the lie detector. I’ve listened to that tape. Kyle was in NZ at the time, and wasn’t in the studio. I think when the girl came out and said she had been raped, everyone was just stunned. Kyle just blurted out something. I don’t think he was being callous. I think he may have been genuinely wondering if it was just once, or if there was more incidents her mother should have known of, not asking if she had been sleeping around. I don’t think anyone in that situation would have reacted better. When his brain caught up to his mouth, he backed up, and quickly ended the segment, and offered the girl counseling. He didn’t ask more questions. He didn’t press on. He didn’t ask the girl if it was her fault, or try to insinuate that she brought it on herself. I know people love to hate Kyle, but this is one of those things I will not budge on. Kyle didn’t do wrong. That blame for that incident rests squarely on the girls mother. She knew. She hadn’t helped the girl before that, she didn’t help her through it. We can only hope she got help afterwards because Kyle and Jackie arranged it.

But John Laws just disgusts me. I hope every victim of abuse lets John know that IT’S NOT THEIR FAULT.  Fuck you John Laws. Fuck You.

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Illegal Immigrant Sex Offender protected by Democratic Senator

Elections are more important than laws….

According to police records, Sanchez was 15 when he was arrested on a charge of aggravated sexual assault in 2009. The records show he was accused of sexually assaulting an 8-year-old boy at least eight times and sentenced to two years’ probation and required to register as a sex offender.

Dem Sen Robert Menendez

He was working as an intern in the office of New Jersey Democrat Senator Robert Menendez. When he failed to update his sex offender registration, local prosecutors considered arresting him. At that time, immigration officials learned that Sanchez had applied for the Obama administration’s Deferred Action for Childhood Arrivals program, which would have allowed him to stay in the country and legally work for two years. He did not disclose his arrest or status as a sex offender on the application and was eventually denied, according to the documents. – Which means he applied for the Dream Act that we keep hearing about.

So what’s interesting, is that Sen. Menendez is known to be very pro-immigration. He claimed they didn’t do a background check on Sanchez, since he was a volunteer. – I’m going to call Bullshit on this one. No matter where you volunteer these days, they do background checks on you. I can’t imagine anyone who is allowed near sensitive documents, is not going to have been put through a background check.

Then, when ICE moved in to arrest him, they were asked to delay it till after the election. – Which the Senator won.

So, there’s a few issues here. The Dream Act. Anyone who works on the border can physically see this one is a bad idea. When they announced it, we saw a flood of people running the border. At least they managed to catch the fact that he wasn’t a desirable.

Politicians. Time and time again we see them putting their own agendas ahead of anything else. Hey, this guys a sex offender and an illegal? No worries. Let’s just hold off till after my election, eh?

The fact that ICE did hold off on arresting him instead of doing their job.  They categorically denied this was the case. Yeah, right. I’m sorry, but I have trouble believing anyone who uses the term “categorically deny”.

So we’ve got all the shit going down in England with Savile, who apparently was sheltered from very high up, we’ve got Senators in the US hiding their sex offenders. For years people in Australia have been protected. When will people start to see that sometimes you just have to say fuck it, to hell with my job, I’m going to stand up and do whats right?

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The Royal Commission

A chance for ALL our voices to be heard

I’m so happy that Julia Gillard is pressing on with the Royal Commission into child abuse. I’m so grateful for people like Detective Inspector Peter Fox who had the balls to go on television and talk about it when no-one else would. I’m grateful to all the people from all the different support groups that kept up the fight for all these years.

When I was asked to go public, I wasn’t sure about it. I was tired of seeing other kids in the industry falling to pieces after all they had been through. I knew I didn’t want any other kids to go through what I did. I was very fortunate that I was able to speak in magazines and on television about my abuse. I copped a lot of shit about it. Hell, people on the whirlpool forum are still bitching about me having gone on TV to talk about it. I’m glad I did it though. The last three years have changed me so much personally. Being able to talk about it, being able to let it go and not keep it inside anymore has changed my whole outlook on life. Sure, there were super hard days, there were days when I was so heavily criticized I wondered if I had done the right thing.

I was grateful I had started a discussion. I was happy that people were finally openly talking about abuse, even if they were bitching about me while doing it. The main point was, it was no longer a taboo subject.

My only sadness was when people commented that while it was great that I could talk about it, because I was given that platform where I could, what about all the other victims out there. The ones who weren’t famous enough to go on TV and talk about it. What about them? Would they ever be given that opportunity to speak? It’s true, it’s not fair that some people get the opportunity to be heard while other don’t.

Well, now they have. I’m so glad that EVERY victim of child abuse out there will be given the opportunity to tell their story. That we can all go forward, we can all add our piece. We can all seek a little bit of justice.

I hope that everyone uses this opportunity to be heard. I know it can be tough. It can be very scary to talk about your past. It can be horrific reliving it while talking about it. It can be soul baring. But it’s totally worth it. It might take a while for you to realize the difference the talking has made, but it will make a difference.

I urge all of you to take this opportunity to tell your story. Do it for yourself. Do it for the others before you, and do it for the others behind you. If we all stand up and talk about the past, hopefully the ones in the future won’t have to….

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Witch Hunt or Fourth Estate?

Media Coverage of Child Abuse

This week I’ve noticed there’s a lot of coverage of child abuse cases. While the fact that so many kids are being abused makes me sad, I’m thrilled that it’s now making front page news. Over the last couple of years, it’s become more and more acceptable to talk about it, to cover it. To acknowledge that it happens.

We’ve come a long way in the last 2.5 years. When I went public with my story, people were furious. He wasn’t named, and I was told to name and shame or STFU. Then, he was named, and people were furious. Couldn’t win either way. At least he’s alive to defend himself…. (Looking forward to that!) The last few weeks, nobody seems to have any problem with Jimmy Savile being named, even though he’s dead and can’t refute the claims. I wonder if people are ok with it because we’ve come that far in the last couple years we now actually believe girls when they speak up, or if it’s because he’s just so obviously creepy there’s no doubt, or if it’s because he’s dead and doesn’t have to live with a possible tarnished rep.

No matter, I’m thrilled to see the media covering abuse. I’m so glad I was a part of that. I hope there’s lots more cases where people can use that medium to get justice, when they’re not being listened to in other avenues. I don’t think it needs to be just famous people either. Regular people should have the ability to be heard too. People might call it a media witch hunt, but if nobody will listen to you, or worse, it’s getting repeatedly swept under the carpet, the media can be an important tool. When you’ve been silenced for so long, seeing your words everywhere can be very powerful and healing.

Plus, I bet if a kid told their predator they were going to tell not only their parents, but the newspaper, it’d stop pretty quick….

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Mr. Snuffleupagus

Snuffy, or the big hairy elephant in the room…

Remember Sesame Street? It’s all over the news now again thanks to the Presidential Elections. I was at Starbucks the other day, and the lady in front of me in line was making a reference to Sesame Street and Big Bird. Then she said something about Snuffy being invisible. I pointed out that they made him visible to the adults in the end. She said really, Why? I said it was something to do with the producers of the show wanting him to be visible because they were worried about pedophilia and kids not being believed. She said that sounded silly, and that pedophilia wasn’t that big a deal. Certainly not big enough to make a whole change on the show. I wanted to point out that it was probably a big deal to the 1 in 5 kids that’s a victim of child abuse, but instead I just grabbed my latte and thought about how little people care about issues that affect so many people. How swept under the carpet that child abuse is. How so many people just think because it didn’t hapen to them, that it’s not a big deal. About how basic human rights are like oxygen, it’s not a big deal until you’re not getting any.

As a kid, all the campaigns were focused on “Stranger Danger”. Kids were taught not to accept lollies from creepy men in cars. We shouldn’t talk to men in trenchcoats in the park. We shouldn’t believe someone who says Mum or Dad came to pick us up. They never taught kids what to do when someone in the own family was the creepy man hurting them… Nobody wants to face the fact that someone in their own family may be an abuser. People will just say, Oh don’t worry anout Uncle Fred. He’s just affectionate. Uncle Tom is just a bit handsy. Uncle Peter just likes to play tickle games. Kids aren’t told that when they go to family functions they have the option of NOT hugging their Uncle, or their cousin, or that family friend they don’t like for some reason. They’re told to sit on their lap for a family photo. When a child protests, they’re passed off as being grunpy or silly. The adults don’t want to listen. Which teaches the kids that the adults are allowed to do whatever they want to them. Because the adults don’t want to believe, and even if they do, it’s not polite to say anything. Which just makes the abuser bolder, while making the kids weaker.

TWO out of three child abuse survivors who contacted a helpline were harmed by a member of their immediate family, with just 2 per cent hurt by a stranger, research shows.  A further one in four victims was harmed by a member of their extended family, one in eight by a family friend and one in 10 by a member of a religious group. Teachers were responsible for 5 per cent of child abuse, the research found. It is estimated between four and five million Australian adults are survivors of childhood trauma. Here’s the link to the News.com.au article.

It’s time that the Stranger Danger campaigns were swapped for a more realistic one. We also need to be teaching adults and not just kids. We need to teach adults that if a child is trying to tell them that they aren’t comfortable around an adult, that maybe there’s a reason for that. Maybe they just get a quirky feeling from them, just like we as adults get a bad vibe from people. However, if a kid doesn’t want to hug that person, or sit on their lap, it’s important that we don’t force them to. Tell them it’s OK. Teach them that their body is theirs, and nobody has the right to be in their personal space. If you don’t like that creepy uncle who refuses to shake your hand and insists on hugging you, even when you’ve made it clear you don’t like it, why is it then OK to allow a kid to have their personal space invaded in the same way? If your kids suddenly start hating going to Grandpa’s, or they decide they don’t like going to Boy Scouts, ask them why. Listen. Use your insticts. Don’t just ignore the issue because “it’s not polite” to say no to a hug. Don’t just ignore that someone is being innapropriate with your kids because you just don’t want to face reality. Too many adults just ignore the whole issue because “it’s messy”. Too many kids who were abused grow up and just let it happen to the next generation because they survived it, so it must just be a part of life, and their kids will survive it too. Or worse, they’ve just put themselves in such a state of denial, that just like Snuffy, who Big Bird insisted was there for 17 seasons, was not seen, because the adults just chose not to see him. They saw the effects of Snuffy, and kept blaming it on other things, or using the Snuffy excuse as a scapegoat. Finally though, Big Bird worked out how to get the adults to see that Snuffy was real. Finally the adults believed in Snuffy. Believe in Snuffy. He’s real, and so is child absue.
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The Other Side of Penn State

I’m reposting the email I got from PROTECT today. You can go to their website and sign up to get their email directly.

Looking the Other Way

Americans are outraged that Penn State officials failed to report a suspected child predator. But what about public officials who know about child predators and look the other way?

PROTECT in Pennsylvania

Pennsylvania State Rep. Dan Deasy announces the “Attorney General Mandated Reporter Law,” which will be part of Alicia’s Law in 2012. Behind him, L to R: Rep. Dan Frankel, Alicia Kozakiewicz, Former Congressman Patrick Murphy and Camille Cooper of PROTECT.

Today, PROTECT took our Child Rescue Emergency Campaign and our fight for sunlight and accountability to Pennsylvania.Our newest legislation, sponsored by Representatives Dan Deasy, Mike Sturla and Dan Frankel, and championed by former Congressman Patrick Murphy, will make the Attorney General of Pennsylvania a mandated reporter of child abuse and exploitation.

“Penn State covered up one alleged child predator,” says PROTECT’s Grier Weeks. “The State of Pennsylvania is covering up thousands. This law will force them to admit it and mandate that the Attorney General report the crimes to local law enforcement.”

No More Coverups

Law enforcement map showing traffickers of child rape videos and crime scene photos in the Pennsylvania region.

Since 2006, PROTECT has negotiated behind the scenes with politicians in Congress, the U.S. Justice Department and the States. We show them proof that they could rescue hundreds of thousands of children and we call for action.They always want to get away with the minimum. One senior official in the U.S. Justice Department begged us privately not to embarrass his administration by exposing the full truth, promising to do more.
When politicians cover up crimes like these, children are raped and childhoods are destroyed. That’s not rhetoric, it’s the truth. So, last month, we launched our Child Rescue Emergency campaign.

Pennsylvania officials don’t think they have an emergency now. But when they are forced to open up law enforcement databases and report the actual shocking number of child predators they are hiding, the tide will turn.

Are You With Us?

We are proud of our tough little band of staff and volunteers. But we cannot keep taking on and winning big fights like these without help.

Let’s just admit it. Even though there are millions of survivors of child abuse, millions of parents and millions of caring people, Americans still don’t fight for abused children the way they fight for all of their other “special interests.” It’s a disgrace.

If you value what we do, and you can support us financially, please help us keep the phones on. But even if you can’t, there are other ways to keep this fight going. Take action when we send action alerts. Join our Facebook community and help us make it 10 times bigger. Get your local government to pass a Child Rescue Emergency resolution. Spread the word every way you can.
And we’ll continue to be the only voice in the political arena fighting for child protection… and doing it in a bipartisan, successful way.

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Corey Feldman Goes Public

Corey Feldman talks about Pedophiles in Hollywood

On an ABC special episode on Underage and Famous this week, Corey Feldman shocked a lot of viewers by coming out and saying the biggest problem for kids in Hollywood is always will be Pedophiles.

Sounds familiar doesn’t it?

The reaction is also similar. People have come out on blogs calling Corey a has been seeking another minute of fame. They’re saying he must be trying to get another production greenlit. They say he should name names or STFU.
Are these the same 5 jaded people with nothing better to do?

I hope he doesn’t name anyone. For one thing, there’s more than one crooked person in the industry. If he names one, all focus turns to that person. People get complacent and forget about all the other perps. We need to come together and stand as one and fight the industry as a whole. Focusing on one story doesn’t help anyone. People should applaud Corey for coming forward and shedding light on the industry, not shun him and assume he’s got an alterior motive.

I stand with Corey. I support him and believe him. I hope more actors will stop thinking about maintaining the status quo and start speaking up for what’s right. The protection of the future generation is more important than an acting job

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Stand up for victims of child abuse

National Child Protection Week

A study has just been released in Australia that says that just one third of Australians would call police if a child told them they were being sexually abused.

The results, released on Wednesday, showed that 48 per cent of people would not take action in clear-cut examples of child abuse for fear they might be wrong, while 42 per cent said they did not think it was their business. But most of the 22,000 people surveyed by the National Association for Prevention of Child Abuse and Neglect (NAPCAN) believed child abuse was a serious issue.

Since March, when I went public with my own history of abuse, there has been literally thousand of blogs, forums and tweets discussing my case. So many people couldn’t believe that it had been allowed to happen. People are outraged. People all claim that they would have done something. However, if you were really put in that spot, would you have? This study shows, maybe not.

People have judged me for going public. A lot of people are upset by the “Trial by Media”. However, I wouldn’t have done it any differently if I had to do it over again. By going public, it has forced people to talk about it. It’s forced people to think about what they would do if confronted by the same situation. It made witnesses come forward and talk to the police about it. People who otherwise may have been too scared to speak, in case they heard the infamous, “You’ll never work in this country again” line. Unfortunately, TV in Australia is a tiny community. People are terrified of speaking out of school. It’s very easy to be blacklisted and never work again. I have no doubt that if this was not public that many people would still be denying knowledge of the situation because they’d be scared to talk about it.

I really hope that by speaking out, that parents are thinking very hard about whether to put their kids into acting or modeling. I hope that if they are in the biz, they’re watching their kids like hawks.

I hope that people will get the courage to speak up if they see abuse. If a kid tells you something is not right, go investigate it for yourself if you don’t believe them. Then go to the police. Then get your kid some help. Call Bravehearts or any other child advocacy group.

Don’t let happen to your kids what happened to me. Don’t be the 2/3rds of Australia that would just look the other way. Even if it’s not your kid. It’s your job to protect them. They came to you, they asked for your help. Do the right thing and get them the help they need.

Go to the Bravehearts website to learn more about Breaking the Silence on Child Sexual Assault.

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