social media – Page 2 – Sarah Monahan

Connecting with famous people through Social Media.

I love the internet. I love Social Media. I even used to work at a SEO company, and actually got to sit on FaceBook and Twitter all day long. I wrote blogs for several companies and helped others understand Social Media and how to incorporate it into their business.

Since going public with the past a couple years ago, Social Media has been a mixed bag of fish for me. It was pretty vindicating using television as a medium to share my story. I had been abused in a television environment, so using it as the tool to go public and share what happened to me was a great way of taking that tool and re-purposing it.

As the story broke in Woman’s Day, I was still in Texas. I didn’t even know it had been published, till I saw it online on the WD website. Internet forums starting to go crazy with the story. I was watching the ACA and TT websites as they had coverage of interviews with other people. Then ACA sent Peter Stefanovic to my house in Texas to interview me. We used Skype to stay in contact with people in Australia, trying to figure out just how crazy big things had blown out of control. We were all watching forums like Whirlpool Hey Dad scandal thread. (Which is now several hundred pages over 3 different threads) Twitter went crazy. Hey Dad actually trended for a little bit there. People made all kinds of FaceBook pages. It seemed like everyone who had access to a keyboard had an opinion on the issue.

I got lots of emails, both good and bad. I had people commenting on my website. I was watching the twitter feed to see what people were saying.

I am now very sensitive about what I say about other people on Social Media. I know that people, even celebrities and famous people, or those like me who are simply in the news, do actually read the internet. We do use Twitter. We can see what people are saying about us. Unfortunately, about a good 80-90% of it is negative…

Before saying how much you hate someone on Twitter or in a forum, think about how YOU would feel if someone said that about you. Then imagine you’re reading that while you’re already under a whole heap of stress. It was hard enough going public, laying my soul bare, telling people about my past, without then having thousands of people judge me and post everywhere that I was simply a money grubbing publicity whore seeking an extra 15 minutes of fame and a way to sell Going Down. I was trying to do the right thing. I was trying to speak out about abuse. I was using the medium I was comfortable in, since that was what I knew. I was trying to make an impact, getting the message out there. I had expected there to be some negative reaction, I didn’t expect to see people slamming me on places like Expecting Mothers message boards. I could only imagine what they would be like if their kids came to them for help one day….

Anyhow, over the last couple of years I’ve changed a lot. I have a new outlook on life, and a new outlook on Social Media, as well as celebrities.

I just want to remind people that celebrities and other people in the spotlight are people too. They have good days and bad days. They have feelings, just like you and me. Just like you wouldn’t like it if a bunch of people talked shit about you, celebs aren’t immune to people talking smack about them. I’m sure Liesel doesn’t appreciate people talking about her figure while she’s preparing for the Olympics, (she’s a fucking swimmer people, not a Victoria’s Secret Model) or even Rihanna tweeting that her performance sucked in Sweden, when they didn’t know her Grandma had just died. There are so many cases I can think of when people are coming down on others when all they really need is a hug. I love that Sophie Monk, Piers Morgan and Ricky Gervais are witty in replies, but I’m sure they’re not totally immune either.

Being mean on Twitter is just another form of cyberbullying. Celebs aren’t immune.

So, I thought these Jimmy Kimmel clips were funny. It’s a great way to remind people that Celebrities are human just like us. It’s presented in a funny way, but it has a good meaning behind it. There’s a few of them on YouTube. Go watch, and next time, think before you tweet.

BTW, I’m @shrimptank on twitter.

Make friends in Minutes.

When I was a kid, I had penpals. The kind you had to actually use a pen to write to. Then, you’d send the letter off, and a few weeks later, you’d get a letter back. Sometimes I miss the days of real letters.

I’m also very grateful for new technology. If it wasn’t for Facebook and feeling like I’m still a part of the lives of my friends back in Australia, I think I’d be a lot more homesick. I love that I can read the Australian newspaper everyday and I love that there’s an app for the 2DayFM radio station so I can listen to Aussie accents here. I enjoy watching the Aussie news over the internet, even if it is in small 3 minute blocks.

When I’m having a bad day, I can email someone and get a response back and feel better in minutes. When Corey Feldman did his interview, it brought back a lot of memories and some heavy emotions. Then I got an email from another child actress. She had famously gone public in the US and pissed a lot of people off. She had been following my case in the media, and another friend on FB put us in touch with each other. She wrote me a couple emails and put everything very matter of factly. In the first email she talked about the balance of power in assault cases. She called it “sexual abuse vs fame public reaction mathematical algorithm” The public’s belief in and support of a victim of rape/sexual abuse is directly proportional to the fame and “likeability” of the victim, and inversely proportional to the fame and “likability” of the perpetrator. In other words, when a victim goes public with her story the response she receives will have nothing to do with the severity of the rape, number of occurrences or age at when the crime occurred. It will be based solely on her fame/power vs the fame/power of her perpetrator. She had several examples, and it was kind of a downer, because I’m not the famous/rich one in this case….

Her second email however was like a revelation and has helped me tremendously. Also: Something to remember – that I had to learn – is that the apprehension, conviction and incarceration of your perpetrator is NOT actually YOUR responsibility. It is the responsibility of law enforcement.

But remember, when people attack you for speaking out: any trouble the bastard is in, is entirely HIS doing. You didn’t “get him in trouble” – HE DID when he started assaulting children.

By the same token, when those on your side harass you to do more, you are not on call to “put him in jail”. You called the cops, it’s THEIR job to put him in jail.

This was the most empowering thing anyone has ever told me. It lifted the weight off me. She was right. I had done my duty and told the police. I gave them my statement. I invited them into my home in Texas and continued the investigation here. When they email me or call, I answer them the best I can. A lot of people may not agree with the way the investigation started, but it was MY journey, not theirs.

I have been laying low in Texas since the investigation started, because I was told I should. It was “duty” to go crawl back under a rock till it was over. I had to make sure there was a conviction. If I didn’t stay quiet, it was my fault if the case for the other girls didn’t pan out.

I’m sorry, but it’s NOT my responsibility. I will do my best to help the police in any way I can, but I’m not going to stop posting on my blog, or be social on twitter, or talk to people on FB, or have conversations with people in real life just because there’s an investigation underway. I don’t know how long it could take. Nobody does, and people can’t realistically expect me to withdraw for years if it drags out that long. As long as I’m not talking about the investigation, there’s no reason I can’t also be an active member of social media.

Meanwhile, in the twitterverse, I think we’ve all been following what’s happening with Andy. His blog is now down off the internet, and he’s currently hiding hoping things will blow over. I’ve been amused that people have been so upset that I was quoted in the Sun as having laughed when I saw Andy in there. With the way Andy dishes on others, he has to expect that people give it back. And apparently he does. I got this PM from him this morning after someone called me a “nasty piece of work” on Twitter.

I’ve had some really interesting conversations with people over the last few days thanks to Social Media. It’s nice to be able to communicate instantly with people all over the world, instead of waiting till it’s already old news. That being said, I would still caution people to be careful what they say on the Internet. It’s easy to take things out of context. Sarcasm doesn’t convey well in 140 characters. You can still be taken out of context. Private doesn’t really mean private. Andy used to love grabbing screenshots on my PM’s to him, as I have done above. But, it also lets you communicate instantly and be able to check in on someone and make sure they’re OK.