Dealing with Celebrity Sex Offenders

When a celebrity is a sex offender, the victim doesn’t have the option of simply avoiding them.

I turned on the TV this morning, and as I was flicking through channels, Robert’s face popped up.

After leaving Hey Dad..! he mainly did voice over work, but he had a tiny part in a C grade movie called Race The Sun. It was about a group of Hawaiian kids who built a solar car. Anyway, since it’s an American movie that was filmed in Australia, they play it here, and it means that when I am randomly flicking through channels, I am subjected to hearing his voice, and seeing his face. Even though I no longer live in Australia, there’s still the potential of me having to see him, when I least expect it.

Thankfully, I’m pretty good at dealing with it. It’s not really a huge trigger for me anymore. (Well, today was ok) But it got me thinking about all the other people out there who are unable to avoid their perps, and how there’s always debate about celebrity sex offenders, and whether they should be allowed to continue to work.

It’s a tough question. I think it’s a shame for an entire body of work to be wiped from history simply because one person in the production was a terrible human being. Should all the cast from 7th Heaven never receive royalty cheques again because the dad molested a few girls? Should Hey Dad be wiped from TV because of Robert? What about the Cosby Show? Can we no longer listen to Six White Boomers at Xmas because of Rolf Harris? Should we avoid all movies directed by Roman Polanski, Woody Allan, Victor Salva and Bryan Singer?

I think each person has to decide for themselves. I thought 7th Heaven was cheesey, I never watched myself on Hey Dad, and Cosby always gave me the shits. However, millions of other people loved these shows. But, what about the other cast members. Is it their fault that the male stars here thought they were above the law, and didn’t keep their perverted sexual desires in check? Are we punishing an entire production by boycotting a show because of one person? Sometimes I feel like it’s not fair to the other people associated with a show. I think it’s not fair to Simone Buchanan and Ben Oxenbould that they can’t proudly display Hey Dad clips on their resumes because of something that Robert Hughes did. I feel bad for 7th Heaven cast members who rely on that residual income. I feel sorry for The Cosby kids who have to answer questions about Cosby when they’re trying to do interviews about something completely unrelated.

Then, Robert pops up on my TV.

racethesun

My brain goes from trying to be the impartial person, right back to seeing it from the view of anyone who has dealt with a celebrity sex offender. Even when I move overseas, I may still be subjected to seeing that trigger. Anyone who has dealt with a celebrity sex offender could be subjected to their attacker at any point. Even if they avoid their movies, or make a point not to turn on the TV when their show is on, at any point, while flicking through channels, that person could pop up. It might be on E! News, or a TV commercial, or on a random talk show. The only thing the person can do, besides refusing to watch any form of media, is to learn to deal with the trigger. Some people can, and some can’t. Some people need more time, and some don’t have access to the resources that will help them heal from that trauma.

So what’s the answer? I’m not really sure. Maybe there’s a balance. I think that while old stuff, pre-knowledge of sexual offending might be OK to keep showing, for the sake of other actors/crew, and let the public decide if they want to watch, I think that going forward, the offender should be barred from more public work. If you’re a celebrity sex offender, you shouldn’t get to keep putting your name out there. You shouldn’t be able to keep putting your face on TV, or work in movies. You shouldn’t be allowed to be glamorized, and continue to work in the industry. You shouldn’t be rewarded, while your victims have to keep seeing your face, or your name, or hear your voice, over and over, forever and ever.

It’s not just for the victims of these celebrities, but for anyone who was a victim of anyone. Seeing someone convicted of a sex crime be rewarded with work, or strutting down a red carpet sends a horrible message to victims everywhere. While the victim lives with the act forever, and has to learn to heal, the perp is out and about, living a glamorous life, being glorified, and everyone forgiving them. It doesn’t inspire victims to speak up, or try to do anything about their molester. Why bother going through the drama of police investigation, court, etc if the person if just going to go straight back to normal life afterwards? As much as I hate that we all look to Hollywood for life inspiration, we do. If people see that celebrity sex offenders aren’t punished, people will wonder what chance they have of their own perps getting punished, celebrity or not.

Even if I was still working in the industry, I would choose not to work with a sex offender. I would never make a film with Roman Polanski or Woody Allan, or even alleged sex offender Bryan Singer. That’s something that each person still working in the industry has to decide for themselves, but I know where I stand.

What about you? Do you think there’s an answer? How would you deal with it? Let them keep working, boycott all their work? Would you work with a celebrity sex offender on a production? Is art more important? Or are victims the priority? Is there a balance?

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Should you go to the media?

Getting justice can be a long slow road, that sometimes feels like it’s never going to end. For many people, it never does. Their cases are stalled, their investigations halt, and people feel helpless.

Even in my case, people had been to the police before, and nothing had happened. It wasn’t till Woman’s Day and A  Current Affair spoke of my story, that justice was eventually found. It wasn’t easy going public, but eventually it led to a court case, Robert was found guilty, and there was a glimmer of hope that if I could take down such a high profile pedophile, maybe others could do the same with their perpetrators. heydad_WD-article

So it’s logical for others to also contact the media hoping they will be able to do the same for them. I think if you’re strong enough to go through it publicly, and do whatever you need to do to take your perp down, then go for it. There’s a few things you need to know before you contact the media though. I’ve had several people message me, very disappointed by the response they got, or lack of a response from the media. I want people to have the right expectations, so they’re not let down again.ACA interview

I’m not going to insult anyone by saying my case was no different. We all know that being a former actress, people were going to be more interested in my case. I wasn’t so sure when I first signed up for Woman’s Day, but it soon became obvious I was delusional thinking I was just a has been nobody was interested in. Hindsight, of course my story was going to be a big one. But being famous isn’t going to be the difference between me and you getting your story on TV. The biggest hurdle when it comes to media is that they need at least three people to back up a story before they can air it. Without three people corroborating a story, it leaves a network open to defamation and lawsuits, something a media outlet won’t risk. There are ethical standards they must meet, and even I had to sign a bunch of legal paperwork before any of my stuff was aired. Other people backed up my story, and we could proceed. There was a lot of nervousness, because it wasn’t just Robert we were going against. His partner, Robyn, was highly regarded in the industry, and an attack on Robert was also an attack on Robyn. Point is, when you go to the media, make sure you have at least two other people who are willing to back up your story. If you have any photographic evidence, written evidence, anything at all, make sure you let them know. They are powerless to help you without it. Unfortunately, they need as much evidence as the police do…

So I’m not saying don’t go to the media. I think the media is there for all of us to use, not just former child actors like me. But just go in with realistic expectations, so that you’re not disappointed if they can’t help you.

derryn hinch

Make sure you’re prepared for what can happen if your story does get aired. Every pedophile with internet access will attack you. All the social media trolls will attack you. You can never make it go away. Once it’s out there, it’s out. You might find it helps to bring forward other victims and witnesses, but it can also go against you if there ever is an actual court case resulting from it. Still not saying don’t do it, but I want you to be prepared for all the possibilities. – I wasn’t.

Late edit: It’s really hard for the media to deal with minors, or even people who are now adults, but were minors when the abuse occurred. It’s illegal to name a child victim, even as a parent. Remember how my name was all over the place, and then it disappeared? Once Robert was charged, I was officially a victim, and they had to suppress my name. There’s all kinds of legal minefields when it comes to kids. Each and every case is different, and it will depend on whether the reporter thinks they can do your story justice with what you have available. No reporter wants to make your case more difficult, which can happen if not done right.

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Royal Commission looking at the Entertainment Industry

Royal Commission turning the spotlight on the Entertainment Industry

When the Royal Commission was announced a few years ago, we wondered if they would also be looking at the Entertainment Industry. Some people indicated it would only be looking at “institutions” but if the industry isn’t an institution, then I don’t know what is.

After my own ordeal, and of course following all the cases in the UK with Operation Yewtree, as well as hearing about the plethora of cases in the US, it’s fairly obvious, at least to me, that the entertainment industry needs a spotlight to look into some of the darker corners. It would be very naive to think that I was the only case in the Australian entertainment industry. When I went public, I received many messages of support from others who understood, because they too had been through a similar ordeal on a set.

I am thrilled that the Royal Commission has announced that they are seeking others who may have been abused within the industry, and are calling for them to come forward to talk. Even if you weren’t a victim yourself, if you have information on abuses within the industry, please contact the commission, and let them know. Your evidence could help others. It’s not just for television. Here’s their scope: “Institutions within the Royal Commission’s scope may include television networks, film and television production companies, theatrical production companies, dance, drama and performing arts schools or colleges, casting agencies or any other company, agency or organisation, public or private involved in the entertainment industry.”

Here’s the link to the official announcement, which contains the contact details for the commission. I encourage anyone who can help the commission to come forward.

You can contact the Royal Commission via: Phone: 1800 099 340, Email:solicitor@childabuseroyalcommission.gov.au, or Mail: GPO Box 5283, Sydney NSW 2001.

For more information on the Royal Commission please visit our websitewww.childabuseroyalcommission.gov.au

 

 

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Very angry

Wanna know how to get me upset?

Wanna know how to piss of a victim of abuse? Wait until another person goes public about their abuse, and then suggest that they’re just doing it for money for fame.

BSI don’t think people grasp the concept that not everyone wants to be famous. Not everyone is looking for that 15 minutes. Some people just want to be heard. They want justice. They want to right a few wrongs.

Everytime I see a new person who is being investigated, for just a minute, I’m so happy that others are following in my footsteps, and are taking on the high profile untouchables. But that joy doesn’t last very long, because it only takes a few minutes for the doubters to come out. All the people who think the only reason a person would ever speak up is because they want to be the next Kim Kardashian, or they want to pad their bank accounts.

Except for me, I can’t recall the last public figure who actually named another public figure, and then went to court. Corey Feldman spoke up about the industry, but didn’t name specific people. There’s a few others in the US who have spoken up, but unfortunately, the US has a statue of limitations. If a person doesn’t press charges pretty quick, then it just becomes slander if they name someone. Over here, people will speak up to let others know it’s happened, or is still happening. I have spoken to several other former kid actors over here in the US who have been through abuse. Some spoke up, some didn’t. They all know how terribly hard it is to live with, being judged. Every little thing you say will be over analyzed, picked apart, recorded, and then, if you’re lucky enough to make it to court, it can and will be used against you. Ever drunk tweeted Simon Cowell? Well, you can bet your arse that will come up in court. Ever said you thought a certain party would be fun to attend? Oh, you must be making up a story of abuse so that you can hob nob with the other actors then.

Most public figures simply don’t say anything. They don’t want to get involved. It’s messy. Contrary to popular belief, it doesn’t help your career. Not all publicity is good publicity. Corey has been steadily working for years. Not box office gold, but he’s still working. Think his going public about him and Haim being abused helped his career? Pfth. He copped so much shit after that, I’d be surprised if he ever talked about it again. Imagine trying to speak up and have Barbara tell you “You’re ruining an entire industry.” Think I helped my career by standing up? I was slowly finding my place in life. I was just getting my shit together. Then I went public. I couldn’t make a comeback to TV if I wanted to these days. No one would hire me. I was asked to do Celebrity Apprentice the first year, but my “minders” told me not to do it, because it would look bad if we went to court. Now it’s over, I won’t get anything either. There’s not a lot of work for people who speak up against their own. Right now, it’s “too soon” after court. Next year, I’ll be long forgotten.

As a public figure, you’re not supposed to talk about how hard the journey is, in case others who are thinking of speaking up hear you, and decide not to. There’s so much pressure to constantly say the right thing. Everyone is watching, waiting. So many people put demands on you. They’ll all use your name publicly, as if they’re right there with you, when in most cases, they haven’t checked in on you for months. When it’s over though, they all give you a pat on the back, publicly of course, then move on to the next cause. You’re left standing there, life in tatters, not knowing where to go, who your friends are, or what to do next. Can you do what you want now without people watching and speculating? If you decide to go back to TV, will it be used against you in an appeal? Will people come out and think, well, she must have been planning this all along? Or do you just go crawl back under the rock you were dragged out from? Give up on everything?  Some days that seems much easier.

So if it’s that hard for people who are used to the public scrutiny, I can’t imagine what it would be like for a non public person. Funny though, with all these people pointing foul, and claiming anyone speaking up must be doing it for fame or money, I couldn’t name a single person off the top of my head who has spoken up against Robert, Rolf, Jimmy, Max or now Cliff. Can you? Do you know who any of these people are? There are literally hundreds of people who went to police about Jimmy Saville. Hundreds. Can you name any of them? What about Rolf? What about Robert? Do you even know how many people were involved in the Robert investigation? Think it was just the five that went to court? Nope. That’s just the ones who had enough evidence the police could lay charges. There was more. Many more of us. But apart from his niece, who didn’t get charges laid, do you know who any of them are? Do you think we somehow all came out of this four year ordeal better off? Are we now all rich and famous? Are we driving around in Bentleys, on our way to the Yacht Club? Are we drinking with the hipsters in Ibiza? Am I back in Oz, working on a TV show? Better still, did I manage to convert my infamy in Oz to a career in Hollywood? Yeah, cause that’s just what a producer here is looking for…. A has been child star from a foreign country who pressed charges against her on screen dad, while implicating her producer and network. Gosh, I have no idea why I don’t have people from Hollywood offering me stacks of cash for  a reality show. – Yes, that was sarcasm. (Which you’ll learn you need to point out for when your blog posts come up in court)

What about any of the other cases? Are any of those people better off? Have they made a wad of cash? Are they on Oprah? Or DWTS? Or anything?

No. Nobody presses charges against a celebrity for sexual abuse to better themselves. At least not financially. It certainly doesn’t help with your street cred either. It just makes people uncomfortable. Nobody knows what to say in front of you. People at work will be paranoid that you’re now the sexual harassment lawsuit girl. People will think you magically got a bunch of money. Not sure where from. I didn’t get any victims of crime money. The govt slashed it while the police were investigating. Robert’s lawyer made a big deal about spreading the rumor that his client was bankrupt. (Of course, he’s still got enough for an appeal though) Not that I could sue anyway. While there’s no statute for criminal charges, one for a civil suit passed well before we went public. We can have the dates waived with a court order, but after being through court once, I doubt most people have the energy left to fight again. I know I don’t. I do hope all the girls in the Rolf Harris case can band together for strength and follow through on their case for compensation. They probably won’t get much after lawyers fees, etc, but hopefully it’s enough they can pay for counseling, or at least a time out to de-stress from the court proceedings.

I know I’m rambling on at this point. I guess all I really want to say is, before you open your mouth and declare that someone must be getting unfairly targeted for being a singer, actor, sportsperson or whatever, stop and think. Do you even know who the victim is? Do you know anything about them at all? Do you have any idea of what they’ve been through, or what it must be like for them to now be speaking up? Do you really think there’s anything to be gained by them pressing charges? Most importantly, when you open your mouth with your doubts, who else are you hurting? Are you questioning your own loved ones? Would they have told you something that was happening to them, but now won’t, because they think that you’ll think they’re just making it up? Are you passing judgement on a friend who may have been through abuse, but hasn’t shared that with you?

When you declare someone must be doing it for fame or fortune, it says a lot more about you than about the victim. It says that it’s something that you’d consider doing. That whole thing about robbers being worried about being robbed, or hitmen being killed, cheaters being cheated on, etc…

Most of us just want to stop the pain. We want to make it right. We want an apology. We didn’t make a consensual sex tape that “accidentally got leaked”. We were abused, against our will. We’ve already been stripped bare and had our emotions played with. We don’t need it again while already going through a shitty experience. Don’t be that person who pokes someone who’s already on a ledge.

 

 

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Sentencing

What will he get?

I’m sitting on my couch in my RV, watching a show on E! about how celebrities cover up scandals. It’s showing how if you’ve got enough money, you can cover up almost anything, which I’ve seen first hand. More scary though, is how even after the scandals are exposed, people forgive them because, well, they’re famous. Look at Roman Polanski, OJ Simpson, Kobe Bryant, Mike Tyson. All violent offenders, and yet, still fawned over. How many people need to say they were molested by Michael Jackson before someone is believed? How many pedophiles are running around Hollywood, molesting kids, and nobody will talk about it? When people like Corey Feldman talk, they’ve got people like Barbara Walters accusing him of ruining an entire industry. Yeah Babs, go ahead and blame the victim. I’m so glad she’s retiring.

I’m pretty lucky I was given the opportunity to speak out. I didn’t want to when I was first asked. I had long left the industry, and didn’t want to be dredging up old shit. But when one of the kids in my class had an incident, it made me so mad. It was like all the rage I had buried came flooding back to the surface. When Stephen contacted me again, I knew I had to talk. People who are still working aren’t going to talk. It’s a career killer. I didn’t have a career, so I didn’t have anything to lose. Or so I thought…

Im not going to sugar coat it. The last 4 years have been tough. First, I had to think about everything I had tried to forget. I had to deal with the emotions of seeing all the people from the past again. Of seeing people who let it happen as a kid because they liked working suddenly popping up wanting to say something now like they care. Or worse, saying “Oh I had no idea.”

I feel bad for people who had to deal with me over those 4 years. Poor Stephen copped a lot of shit from me. Many days I resented him for bringing all this up. He was always super brutally honest with me, and some days I just wasn’t up for it. Sorry Stephen…. I am grateful to you, please know that.

The other thing I am grateful for, is that since my case has been so public, I know, or at least I really hope, that nobody will ever let Robert near their kids again. In Texas, Robert would be put on a publicly accessible sex offender registry. Anyone who cared to see if there was an offender near them would see his name, face and charges.  I feel bad for people in Australia who don’t get to know what kinds of creepers live next door.

I was so happy to help Derryn with his Megan’s Law campaign. I would desperately like to see a public sex offender registry implemented in Australia. I think it very fitting that the day after Robert is sentenced, Derryn will be starting his Walk For Justice.

If you haven’t signed the petition yet, please do so.

http://www.gopetition.com/petitions/protect-our-children3.html
Here is Derryn’s schedule for his walk, in case you’d like to join him.

Day One: Saturday, May 17th
Start: 7.30a.m. Langi Kal Kal Prison gates, Langi Kal Kal Rd, Trawalla.
Finish: 9.30 a.m. National Highway A8 at Blackbottom Road.
Start: 3.30p.m. National Highway A8 at Blackbottom Road.
Finish:5.30p.m. National Highway A8, Burrambeet Road, Burrambeet.

Day Two: Sunday, May 18th
Start:  7.30a.m.   National Highway A8, Burrambeet Road.
Finish: 9.30 a.m.  Remembrance Drive  C805 at White’s Road.
Start: 3.30p.m. Remembrance Drive at White’s Road.
Finish: 5.30p.m. Sturt Street  & Pleasant St, Ballarat.

Day Three: Monday, May 19th
Start: 7.30a.m. Sturt St.  & Pleasant St, Ballarat.
Finish: 9.30 a.m.  Victoria St. & Boundary Rd, Ballarat.
Start: 3.30p.m. Victoria St. & Boundary Rd., Ballarat.
Finish: 5.30p.m. Lesters Rd  & Triggs Rd, Bungaree.

Day Four: Tuesday, May 20th
Start: 7.30a.m. Lesters Rd & Triggs Rd, Bungaree.
Finish: 9.30a.m. Main St. & Old Western Hwy, Gordon.
Start: 3.30p.m. Main St. & Old Western Hwy, Gordon.
Finish: 5.30p.m. Old Melbourne Rd and Old Geelong Rd. Crossroads Trading.

Day Five: Wednesday, May 21st
Start: 7.30a.m. Old Melbourne Rd and Old Geelong Rd.
Finish: 9.30a.m. Ingliston Rd & Ingliston-Settlement Rd.
Start: 3.30p.m. Ingliston Rd & Ingliston-Settlement Rd.
Finish: 5.30p.m. Ironbark Rd and McCormack Rd.

Day Six: Thursday, May 22nd
Start: 7.30a.m. Ironbark Rd and McCormack Rd.
Finish: 9.30a.m. Avenue Motel, 272 Main St. Bacchus Marsh
Start: 3.30p.m. Avenue Motel, 272 Main St. Bacchus Marsh
Finish: 5.30p.m. High St & Bulman’s Rd, Melton.

Day Seven: Friday, May 23rd
Start: 7.30a.m. High St & Bulman’s Rd, Melton.
Finish: 9.30a.m. Melton Hwy & Leakes Rd.
Start: 3.30p.m. Melton Hwy &Leakes Rd.
Finish: 5.30p.m. Melton Hwy & King’s Rd. Sydenham.

Day Eight: Saturday, May 24th
Start: 7.30a.m. Melton Hwy & King’s Rd. Sydenham.
Finish: 9.30a.m. Keilor Park Drive (BP) & Fullarton Rd. Keilor
Start: 3.30p.m. Keilor Park Drive (BP) & Fullarton Rd. Keilor
Finish:5.30p.m.St.Monica’s Church, Mount Alexander Rd, Essendon.

Day Nine: Sunday, May 25th
Start: 7.30a.m. St. Monica’s Church, Mount Alexander Rd, Essendon.
Finish: 8.30a.m. Sydney Rd & Victoria St., Brunswick.

Day Ten: Monday, May 26th
Start: 10.30a.m. Sydney Rd &Victoria St., Brunswick.
Finish:12.20p.m. Parliament House, Spring St., MELBOURNE!

I’ll be interested to see what Judge Zahra gives Robert. He can only sentence him based on what he would have received back in the day. I know it will be a dreadfully small sentence. Hopefully it will point out just how far we have come, and how we’ve come to recognize that those old sentences just didn’t do justice to the crime at all.

Whatever the outcome, I think there are many girls sitting at home, grateful we’ve made it this far. Grateful we were finally listened to, that he was charged. We are stronger for having faced him. Court was brutal, but we made it through. We can make it through anything after that.

 

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Former Friends

Or better put, Friends who are Formers

I had a little rant yesterday about faux friends, but it’s not all bad. I have been lucky enough over the last few years to make some really good friends.

It’s kinda weird being an expat. You have a completely different background to other people. There may be some common ground as an adult, and you may learn about the locals culture, but you never lived it, so it will always be different.

It’s kinda the same thing with being a child actor. You had a completely different experience growing up to everyone else. Lots of former kid stars leave the industry and end up with regular jobs, but they don’t share that bond with other people of regular childhood experiences.

I get a double whammy of not growing up in the US, and even in Oz, I didn’t have the normal childhood experience. I have been lucky however to find other Expats to share time with, and even more exciting, other former child stars.

There’s not a lot of child actors in Australia. Maybe the kids from Secret Valley, Henderson Kids, Home & Away, but most are older, not young kids. Kate Ritchie, Rebecca Smart and Jamie Croft were about the only kids my age actively working when I was a kid. The kids in the US are lucky that with so many TV stations, they had a bunch of kids to share experiences with.

The kids in the US are even luckier, because they have set up groups to help try and protect them, to support them, and to just let them know there’s people there for them. I first found A Minor Consideration a few years ago. It’s founded by Paul Peterson, who was a teen idol, and probably best known for his work on The Donna Reed Show. I had written him an email letting him know I thought what he was doing was awesome, and I wished we had that kind of group in Australia. Fast forward a couple of years, and I now have a bunch of the most incredible people I can call friends. Others who share the odd experience of growing up on TV. Some also share the experience of being abused while working on TV.

In the middle of the trial, when I thought my world was going to fall apart, I got this:

heartswithyou
These guys are amazing. When I first met them, they had no idea who I was. Nobody in the US has seen Hey Dad..! I never imagined they wold take me in as one of their own. Yet, they did. They sent me messages of support throughout the months leading up to the trial. I went to LA and met a bunch of them in person at a get together, where I was made to feel like part of  a community. It didn’t matter I was a foreigner. We all shared some strange bond of growing up in the limelight, and I had many of them thanking me for going public, and trying to take a stand for all the kids who had been abused in the industry. Unfortunately the US has a statute of limitations, and by the time some found their courage to talk, the time had passed. Others thankfully had wonderful experiences growing up in the industry, and it was good to hear those stories too.

I’m pretty damn excited that later this month I’m headed to LA for the weekend and I get to hang out with these guys again. I feel very lucky to have met such a wonderful group of people.

Paul Peterson is retiring soon, and some of us are going to try to fill his big shoes. I’ve suggested that after my incredible experience, we have an international division, which was greeted with a big yes. So if you’re another former kid star, or a current child actor or entertainer who needs someone to talk to, even if it’s via email, let us know. A Minor Consideration and it’s members have been the most amazing group, and some days, I honestly don’t know if I could have made it through this without them. These guys are not just other former child stars, they’re my heroes.

A Minor Consideration can be contacted via their website or on FaceBook 

A Minor Consideration isn’t just a social group. Paul and the others work tirelessly to help change laws to protect child entertainers. People think child stars have it all, but as my case has proved, sometimes they really need people to step up and help out.

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Victim Impact Statements

Sentencing and Victim Impact statements

I was watching twitter last night, waiting to see details of what I would be missing in court. I’m back in Texas, and couldn’t attend the start of the sentencing. I had only written my Victim Impact Statement several hours before, and emailed it to the DPP. I had been putting it off. It was incredibly hard to write. Way more confronting than what I expected. I left me feeling raw and exposed. It was a big milestone for me though, because I actually asked one of the people in my office, a former police officer, if I should write it at all, and when he said yes, I took a deep breath and asked if he would help. I’m not good at asking for help. He knew how hard that was for me. He warned me that it was going to be tough, because this wasn’t so much about Robert, as it was a confession to myself. It was going to be hard admitting all those feelings on paper, to say that it has affected me. I’ve been good at hiding it and pretending everything is OK. I had to actually sit down and really think about the ways Robert has changed my life, and acknowledge it.

I only wrote 2.5 pages. My 1SG only had me change a couple words, and flip one sentence, and thought it was good. I didn’t show it to anyone else here though. I worried about it being read out in court. They all were, and while I was worried, I think afterwards I was glad people could see what an impact Robert has had on all of us. I was reading the live tweets. I was outside with Matt, and all he heard was, “Oh God”, and turned around to see a tear rolling down my eye. I read him the line from one of the other girls. santatweetIt says, “As a child, I never wanted Santa to come into my room at night to leave presents”

I think this may be one of the saddest things I’ve ever read. I don’t believe in God, but I love Santa. To think a child was so terrified of people they didn’t even want Santa to come at Christmas is just fucking heartbreaking. I’m sure Robert is too arrogant to care that he broke little pieces off all of us, but I hope he was listening yesterday. I hope when he gets back to prison, he understand our words. I hope he comes to understand the meaning of No Means No, and what it’s like to be terrified of being assaulted by someone else who is higher up the food chain in prison.

I was watching the tweets, and Jodie told me “Very intense stuff. Lots of parallels between different victims’ statements re: effects and feelings”.  One man had such a profound effect on so many people. I wonder how many other girls he has destroyed. There were more of us. Some came forward and couldn’t get charges, some chose not to be a part of the process.  Some are still living in denial, because that’s easier for them. I won’t judge anyone. People have to deal with it the best way they know how.

While Robert wasn’t sentenced yesterday – he comes back on the 16th for the final sentencing, Max Clifford also went to court yesterday.

He was sentenced. He has been given eight years. Max’s charges were also historical, and much shorter than if he were to be charged for offenses now. It was interesting to read snippets of the statements that were given in his case too. I had stated that because of Robert, I could never go back to the industry. One of Max’s victims had similar sentiments: A woman who appeared as an extra in the James Bond film Octopussy had given up on pursuing her career after she was abused in the early 1980s, the court heard. “She aspired to be a stunt double in films but could not follow her dream after what happened to her,” Ms Cottage told the court.

Both sets of girls told of how they would never forget what happened, how they had been robbed of their innocence. How they had their happiness stolen from them. I’m glad that laws have changed, and that sentences are longer now. Victims have to live with it forever. Why should the bastards only get a couple of years?

I told Matt yesterday I just wanted this to all be over. I don’t want to wait another 2 weeks. He said it’s been 4 years, what’s another 2 weeks? I know in the long term, it won’t make much difference. Maybe it’s good, because now Robert has 2 weeks to sit in his cell and think about all the things we said. But I do look forward to when I don’t have to worry about seeing it on the news. When I don’t have to sit glued to my desk, watching it all unfold. I know I could just step back, but I can’t. I know that Robert will always have a part of my soul, but I’ll be glad when he no longer has a part of my daily dealings with life. I’m sure there’s a few of us that are looking forward to the 16th. I know he won’t get a long sentence. It’s all historical. I do hope they give him the maximums for those old sentences though. Maybe then, he can live the rest of his life being affected by us, they way we’ll all have to carry a piece of him to our graves.

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The Bryan Singer scandal

Hollywood sex rings

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Bryan Singer dressed as a priest. That’s not creepy at all…

I want to do more research on the Bryan Singer scandal, but I can’t read any of the sites that have comments. Same BS I got 4 years ago, with everyone saying the victim is only in it for fame or money. When will people learn that there’s absolutely nothing to gain financially or career wise by coming out as a victim of abuse? On what planet do people think that admitting you were molested could be “good for your brand”? It also doesn’t help anybody else who is thinking of disclosing, because they see all the hatred towards the victim, and they don’t want to have them directed at them.

I was finally moving on with life, and having fun with a hobby of filming my scuba diving. So when I was asked to talk about what happened on Hey Dad..! everyone jumped up and down saying I was making shit up to try to sell my scuba series. Nobody has been able to explain to me yet how coming out as a victim of abuse in Australia could possibly help me sell a scuba series to a network in America. Not one person.

Time and again, we see a person who publicly discloses get called a media whore or money grubber. Like Simone, Ben and I, they are all blacklisted. Look at the people in the US who have disclosed. They are all publicly discarded. Corey Feldman was hugely popular when I was a kid. He’s still trying his best to work, but now that he’s threatened to out some of the major pedo’s in Hollywood, he’s not exactly landing a bunch of roles is he? There’s are dozens of kids in Hollywood who have mentioned the problem, and they are all quietly pushed aside. If we’ve learned anything from my case, it’s that the studio doesn’t give a shit about kids, as long as they’re making money.

I wish people would realize that when someone has the courage to try to make a change, they find the balls to stand up and say No More, that they were taken seriously. Instead of having thousands of internet hero’s claim that said person is just trying to make a name for themselves, they would maybe step back, and see that where there’s smoke, there’s fire.

There are LOTS of pedophiles in Hollywood. I hope that the kids there start to stand up and shout. I hope that the Hollywood entertainment reporters, as well as the serious reporters cover the issues. I am so grateful I was given the chance to tell my story. I hope that the kids in Hollywood are also given a chance to tell theirs. I hope that some of those high ranking scumbags are taken down. I hope they make studio sets a safer place for kids worldwide.

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A predators downfall

A Current Affair – Not just for ratings

There has been literally thousands of comments over the last few years on the coverage of our story about being molested by Robert Hughes. A lot of people have seen it for what it is, a great piece of investigative journalism, that has helped to expose the dirty secrets of the industry.  Throughout the last four years, A Current Affair and it’s staff have been nothing but gracious professionals. They’ve been polite, they’ve been diplomatic, and more importantly, they’ve been friends.

When the story first broke, other networks tried to get in on it. I refused to work with a network that had put me in a position to be continually molested, and so they took great pride in slamming me several times throughout the process. Then, they’d think I had forgotten and ask me to do another interview. I especially loved the hypocrisy of them saying “whatever they’re paying you, we’ll double it”… They never understood it wasn’t about money. I simply wasn’t going to work with a network that let me down as a child, and then slammed me every time I refused to work with them as a result. Here’s a tip network execs, if you want someone to work with you, don’t publicly slag them off.

This whole journey has never been about money. Something some networks just don’t understand. The team at Channel 9 has been amazing. Tracy Grimshaw, Ben Fordham & Pete Stefanovic have been great to talk to on camera. You have to be able to trust someone to talk to them on camera, and I never for a minute doubted any of them. Behind the scenes, ACA has some of the kindest, most wonderful producers and staff around.  (That’s you Stef and Grant) They literally held my hand, hugged me, and walked beside me through this whole process.

It saddens me when bitter trolls think that the only reason A Current Affair did this story, or continued with this story was because of the ongoing rivalry between 7 & 9 and think ACA just used it as a means to slam 7. I’m sure it was a great side effect that 9 could slam 7, but let’s face it, 7 deserves to be slammed…. However, what people don’t realize is there was much more to the story than just a dig at another network. People at ACA knew what was happening. They had heard accounts of abuse, and wanted to bring the story to light. They didn’t just cover the story, then disappear until it was over. They’ve stayed in touch over the years. (Unlike so many others) They were genuinely vested in the story. Ben McCormack was in court during the verdict, and called so I could hear it straight from him, while he was there.

I’ve got nothing but love and respect for the whole ACA team. In this episode, chronicling the journey of the last 4 years, they’re not grandstanding or gloating. They are genuinely happy and proud of what ACA has done. They’ve helped me find my courage and strength to bring my perpetrator to court, where he was found guilty. That’s a wonderful thing.

If you can watch this, and think that ACA is only about ratings, and not about justice, then it says a lot more about you than it does about them…

A Current Affair – A Predators Downfall

I think they deserve a medal for their work. Hopefully, they’re remembered at award season. 😉

 

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Guilty

Guilty in a court of law!

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Well, it’s been a very long time coming, but the jury has found Robert guilty on 10 counts.

It’s been a very difficult few years, and the trial was very emotionally draining. I started on Friday afternoon and finished on Wednesday afternoon on the stand. Even though I only had the one charge, I guess his lawyer focused on me, since I was the one who brought the situation public. In the end, it was worth it, because now he’s in prison, awaiting his sentencing.

I’d like to take a moment to thank everyone involved in the case. The members of Strike Force Ruskin, the DPPs office, the wonderful women who volunteer their time at the VWCCS. I’d like to thank the jury who really paid attention during the case, and asked questions, before making a decision.

I want to thank Ben and Simone for backing me up. I know the last four years have been hard for you, and now that it’s over, I hope the industry rewards you for being good people. Also to the other cast and crew who took the stand to give evidence.

I’d like to thank Steve Jackson and Woman’s Day for doing the original article, and I’m forever grateful to Tracy Grimshaw and Ben McCormack for all your investigative journalism and keeping with the story for four years. Also to all the production team, who worked so hard behind the scenes.

I know that my case was not unique; there are others out there in the industry who have been affected, and other predators are being protected. Hopefully though, now more people will have the courage to speak up. Don’t stay silent. You never know how many other people are in the same situation, and you also don’t know how many have already been to the police.

It’s been a long hard journey, but in the end, it was worth it.

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