#whoRUprotecting
For those who don’t receive the emails from Bravehearts, here’s the one that went out today. I’m excited to be an Ambassador for Bravehearts and taking part in this years campaign for White Balloon Day.
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Not just another Former Child Star
For those who don’t receive the emails from Bravehearts, here’s the one that went out today. I’m excited to be an Ambassador for Bravehearts and taking part in this years campaign for White Balloon Day.
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I’m sitting on my couch in my RV, watching a show on E! about how celebrities cover up scandals. It’s showing how if you’ve got enough money, you can cover up almost anything, which I’ve seen first hand. More scary though, is how even after the scandals are exposed, people forgive them because, well, they’re famous. Look at Roman Polanski, OJ Simpson, Kobe Bryant, Mike Tyson. All violent offenders, and yet, still fawned over. How many people need to say they were molested by Michael Jackson before someone is believed? How many pedophiles are running around Hollywood, molesting kids, and nobody will talk about it? When people like Corey Feldman talk, they’ve got people like Barbara Walters accusing him of ruining an entire industry. Yeah Babs, go ahead and blame the victim. I’m so glad she’s retiring.
I’m pretty lucky I was given the opportunity to speak out. I didn’t want to when I was first asked. I had long left the industry, and didn’t want to be dredging up old shit. But when one of the kids in my class had an incident, it made me so mad. It was like all the rage I had buried came flooding back to the surface. When Stephen contacted me again, I knew I had to talk. People who are still working aren’t going to talk. It’s a career killer. I didn’t have a career, so I didn’t have anything to lose. Or so I thought…
Im not going to sugar coat it. The last 4 years have been tough. First, I had to think about everything I had tried to forget. I had to deal with the emotions of seeing all the people from the past again. Of seeing people who let it happen as a kid because they liked working suddenly popping up wanting to say something now like they care. Or worse, saying “Oh I had no idea.”
I feel bad for people who had to deal with me over those 4 years. Poor Stephen copped a lot of shit from me. Many days I resented him for bringing all this up. He was always super brutally honest with me, and some days I just wasn’t up for it. Sorry Stephen…. I am grateful to you, please know that.
The other thing I am grateful for, is that since my case has been so public, I know, or at least I really hope, that nobody will ever let Robert near their kids again. In Texas, Robert would be put on a publicly accessible sex offender registry. Anyone who cared to see if there was an offender near them would see his name, face and charges. I feel bad for people in Australia who don’t get to know what kinds of creepers live next door.
I was so happy to help Derryn with his Megan’s Law campaign. I would desperately like to see a public sex offender registry implemented in Australia. I think it very fitting that the day after Robert is sentenced, Derryn will be starting his Walk For Justice.
If you haven’t signed the petition yet, please do so.
http://www.gopetition.com/petitions/protect-our-children3.html
Here is Derryn’s schedule for his walk, in case you’d like to join him.
Day One: Saturday, May 17th
Start: 7.30a.m. Langi Kal Kal Prison gates, Langi Kal Kal Rd, Trawalla.
Finish: 9.30 a.m. National Highway A8 at Blackbottom Road.
Start: 3.30p.m. National Highway A8 at Blackbottom Road.
Finish:5.30p.m. National Highway A8, Burrambeet Road, Burrambeet.
Day Two: Sunday, May 18th
Start: 7.30a.m. National Highway A8, Burrambeet Road.
Finish: 9.30 a.m. Remembrance Drive C805 at White’s Road.
Start: 3.30p.m. Remembrance Drive at White’s Road.
Finish: 5.30p.m. Sturt Street & Pleasant St, Ballarat.
Day Three: Monday, May 19th
Start: 7.30a.m. Sturt St. & Pleasant St, Ballarat.
Finish: 9.30 a.m. Victoria St. & Boundary Rd, Ballarat.
Start: 3.30p.m. Victoria St. & Boundary Rd., Ballarat.
Finish: 5.30p.m. Lesters Rd & Triggs Rd, Bungaree.
Day Four: Tuesday, May 20th
Start: 7.30a.m. Lesters Rd & Triggs Rd, Bungaree.
Finish: 9.30a.m. Main St. & Old Western Hwy, Gordon.
Start: 3.30p.m. Main St. & Old Western Hwy, Gordon.
Finish: 5.30p.m. Old Melbourne Rd and Old Geelong Rd. Crossroads Trading.
Day Five: Wednesday, May 21st
Start: 7.30a.m. Old Melbourne Rd and Old Geelong Rd.
Finish: 9.30a.m. Ingliston Rd & Ingliston-Settlement Rd.
Start: 3.30p.m. Ingliston Rd & Ingliston-Settlement Rd.
Finish: 5.30p.m. Ironbark Rd and McCormack Rd.
Day Six: Thursday, May 22nd
Start: 7.30a.m. Ironbark Rd and McCormack Rd.
Finish: 9.30a.m. Avenue Motel, 272 Main St. Bacchus Marsh
Start: 3.30p.m. Avenue Motel, 272 Main St. Bacchus Marsh
Finish: 5.30p.m. High St & Bulman’s Rd, Melton.
Day Seven: Friday, May 23rd
Start: 7.30a.m. High St & Bulman’s Rd, Melton.
Finish: 9.30a.m. Melton Hwy & Leakes Rd.
Start: 3.30p.m. Melton Hwy &Leakes Rd.
Finish: 5.30p.m. Melton Hwy & King’s Rd. Sydenham.
Day Eight: Saturday, May 24th
Start: 7.30a.m. Melton Hwy & King’s Rd. Sydenham.
Finish: 9.30a.m. Keilor Park Drive (BP) & Fullarton Rd. Keilor
Start: 3.30p.m. Keilor Park Drive (BP) & Fullarton Rd. Keilor
Finish:5.30p.m.St.Monica’s Church, Mount Alexander Rd, Essendon.
Day Nine: Sunday, May 25th
Start: 7.30a.m. St. Monica’s Church, Mount Alexander Rd, Essendon.
Finish: 8.30a.m. Sydney Rd & Victoria St., Brunswick.
Day Ten: Monday, May 26th
Start: 10.30a.m. Sydney Rd &Victoria St., Brunswick.
Finish:12.20p.m. Parliament House, Spring St., MELBOURNE!
I’ll be interested to see what Judge Zahra gives Robert. He can only sentence him based on what he would have received back in the day. I know it will be a dreadfully small sentence. Hopefully it will point out just how far we have come, and how we’ve come to recognize that those old sentences just didn’t do justice to the crime at all.
Whatever the outcome, I think there are many girls sitting at home, grateful we’ve made it this far. Grateful we were finally listened to, that he was charged. We are stronger for having faced him. Court was brutal, but we made it through. We can make it through anything after that.
We like to play movies at work. It makes a nice distraction from the news on the other TV. Today someone wanted to watch BeetleJuice. While looking for it, we found there’s going to be a BeetleJuice 2.
Is everything from the 80’s being remade? I mean, it’s one thing when they re-do Neighbors. Nobody remembers the 1981 Dan Ackroyd and John Belushi version. I don’t know anyone else who has even seen it. Plus, it seems while it’s the same name, they changed the concept slightly. But when they’re remaking everything else, Like Point Break, it’s just getting ridiculous. Point Break doesn’t need a remake. We all remember the first one. It’s a classic. Please don’t fuck with it.
TV isn’t much better. There’s nobody with an original idea there either. Or not many. Because one person comes up with an idea, and then all the other networks, instead of coming up with an idea, just take that idea, and call it something else, and put it on their channel. How many cooking shows are there? Hells Kitchen, My Kitchen Rules, Come Dine with Me, Iron Chef, The Great Australian Bakeoff, plus a few more. It’s one thing on American TV, where there are literally hundreds of channels to pick from, but in Oz, where there’s less channels than I have fingers, it’s too much.
Singing shows? The Voice, The Voice Kids, It Takes Two, Australian Idol, The X Factor, Popstars, etc.
Then you’ve got your dancing shows. Dancing with the Stars, So You Think You Can Dance, Everybody Dance Now, and now they’re bringing in Strictly Come Dancing, and I’m sure there’s more. Personally, if I was in charge, I’d change it up some, to at least make it a little interesting. Like DWTS. Come on, every season they’ve only got a couple of actual “stars” on it. So why not go all out and do a Dancing with the Former Child Stars? You could get a mix of Aussie and US former kid stars. Lets face it, Aussie networks always have to have a token American. Candice Cameron Bure is on the current US version, so she’s probably out, but I’m betting you could get Jodie Sweetin. Corey Feldman did Dancing on Ice. I bet he’d come to Oz to do DWTS. What’s Jamie Croft doing these days? Remember Radames Pera? He was the Young Grasshopper on Kung Fu. He’s an awesome guy. I could put together a whole list of formers…. Its a win win for everyone. The audience gets a title that accurately reflects the show, but they get to see all their childhood idols all grown up. The kids get to hang out and get back into shape while dancing up a storm. A charity gets some money. I think I might go ahead and pitch that one! Lemme know who you’d want to see on there.
I really wish networks would be willing to take more risks. Its sad when they try a new show, and if it doesn’t rate well in 2 episodes, they shelve it. You’ve got to give new programs time to find an audience. Like I thought the concept for Excess Baggage was brilliant. Everyone always says if they had access to chefs and trainers like the stars did, they’d look awesome too. So here was a chance for that, and it only saw two episodes go to air before it was pushed off to another station. Apparently nothing could compete with The Biggest Loser….
Alas, I can complain all I like, but I’m not in charge of programming. All I can do is vote with my remote. So can you. If you’re tired of the same crap on every channel, switch it off.
For the network executives, please, please, take a risk. Try something new. Trust the audience to watch something new. Then give new shows the time to find their groove before shelving it and going back to the same old shit.
I’ve been getting lots of questions about what I’m going to do now that the case is over.
We all know I was an actor as a kid. We all know how that turned out… I didn’t hate acting, but I didn’t like the industry. There was lots of good people, but also plenty who knew what was going on, and chose to ignore it for the sake of their own paycheck. The industry is not glamorous. It’s not show play, or show fun, it’s show business. I think most people look at entertainers and all they see is the parties and red carpets, and the few bloated paychecks. I don’t think people realize the ridiculous hours, the hard physical labour, or that the rest of the cast and crew might be barely making minimum wage.
When I first moved to the US, I got an agent. Before Matt and I were ready to get married, I looked into getting back into the industry as a way of getting a visa so I could stay here, till we were ready to decide if we wanted to be together forever. It was the early 2000’s, and all the movies were teen flicks that involved lots of nudity or sex scenes. Neither of which I am interested in.
Matt and I got married, and I ditched the idea of acting. My few encounters on movie sets in the US made me think I never wanted to act again. Years later, I thought it might be fun to document my scuba diving fun. So we created Going Down. I had filmed some stuff, even gotten some sponsorships, and was planning a few places to dive, when I was contacted to go public about what happened to me on set. I had really enjoyed playing producer for Going Down. I loved setting up dives. I love contacting people, arranging a shoot. I got to meet awesome people. Matt sent me to the Travel Channel Academy so I could learn to shoot and edit with a little more style. I loved it so much, it made me think about returning to the industry.
Then I went public, and my life essentially shut down for the next 4 years. I couldn’t work on Going Down, because it was implied I was making it up to try to sell the show. – Still don’t know how coming out about abuse in Australia could possibly help me sell a travel show in the US…. But, for the sake of making sure there was no possible implication of impropriety, I shelved Going Down. I was also working as a social media consultant. That had to go too. I was told his lawyer made a fuss everytime I tweeted, Facebooked or blogged. Not knowing how long the investigation would last, or if there would be an eventual court case, it was hard to go get a full time job. How do you tell someone I want to work, but I may have to leave for a few weeks at some point to go to court.
I took out US citizenship. I had been so badly dissed by Australia, I never wanted to come home. Texas had embraced me, and I wanted to make it official between us. I was also worried if I had to come home for court, and who knew how long ti could take, I might lose my greencard. I’m now the proud owner of two passports.
At one point I got a call from Australia asking me if I’d like to do Celebrity Apprentice. It would have been a great time, but it’s wasn’t appropriate. Again, the fear of his lawyer accusing me of media whoring. Late last year I was thinking it might be easier to just come spend time in Australia, instead of waiting here. I had a friend who had asked the DWTS people about me being on there. We were told I was “tainted, and wouldn’t be good family viewing.” Like I was the one touching little kids….
I joined the Texas State Guard a few years ago. It’s a weekend thing, but then I found a little known about operation, working in an intel office on the border. I’ve been doing that for over 2 years now, and I love it. I work with great people, have the easiest job, but I know it won’t last forever. It’s subject to yearly contract renewals. So now I’m starting to think, with all the excitement of the last few years over, and me now being able to go back to having a life, where I can do what I want, when I want, what do I want to do? What do I want to be when I grow up?
Do I want to stay in Intel? Do I want to go back to making Going Down? Do I want to return to the industry? Do I want to come back to Australia for a while and work? I’d love to spend some time in Oz so I could be an Aunt, but realistically, I’d have to be working in the industry to afford to live in Sydney for just a few months of the year. Of course, I’d miss my husband and dog terribly if I was gone for months at a time…. Going back to acting, movies fit the bill of a couple months work. When I see things like Russel Crowe making The Water Diviner, it tugs at me to go back to acting. He makes movies look so pure, and so interesting to work on. So would working on a show like DWTS or Apprentice. Or hosting/judging a series. I think that would be awesomely fun, but I don’t think I’m qualified for any of those. I’m no Mel B. Acting on a long term show like H&A or Neighbours is way more work that I’d like to do, but a steady paycheck is hard to beat.
I think for now, I need a little more soul searching. If anyone was to offer me something, I’d certainly consider it. I’m not going to be actively searching for anything though. Not till I’m sure. I might decide since I’m happy at the moment, to just let it be. Or I might move to Florida and buy a bar on the beach.
I hope Simone and Ben are getting lots of work offers. They know what they want to do. They want to act. Power to them. I truly hope the industry lets go of us being tainted, and see’s what incredible actors both of them are. I’ve loved Simone since she was in Secret Valley, I couldn’t believe she didn’t move to the US and become a mega star after her work in Shame. The office was blown away today by Ben’s performance in Caught Inside. Both of them should be having the phone’s ringing off the hook, begging them to be a part of some production. I wish the best to both of them, and I hope to see both of them on my screen soon.
There has been literally thousands of comments over the last few years on the coverage of our story about being molested by Robert Hughes. A lot of people have seen it for what it is, a great piece of investigative journalism, that has helped to expose the dirty secrets of the industry. Throughout the last four years, A Current Affair and it’s staff have been nothing but gracious professionals. They’ve been polite, they’ve been diplomatic, and more importantly, they’ve been friends.
When the story first broke, other networks tried to get in on it. I refused to work with a network that had put me in a position to be continually molested, and so they took great pride in slamming me several times throughout the process. Then, they’d think I had forgotten and ask me to do another interview. I especially loved the hypocrisy of them saying “whatever they’re paying you, we’ll double it”… They never understood it wasn’t about money. I simply wasn’t going to work with a network that let me down as a child, and then slammed me every time I refused to work with them as a result. Here’s a tip network execs, if you want someone to work with you, don’t publicly slag them off.
This whole journey has never been about money. Something some networks just don’t understand. The team at Channel 9 has been amazing. Tracy Grimshaw, Ben Fordham & Pete Stefanovic have been great to talk to on camera. You have to be able to trust someone to talk to them on camera, and I never for a minute doubted any of them. Behind the scenes, ACA has some of the kindest, most wonderful producers and staff around. (That’s you Stef and Grant) They literally held my hand, hugged me, and walked beside me through this whole process.
It saddens me when bitter trolls think that the only reason A Current Affair did this story, or continued with this story was because of the ongoing rivalry between 7 & 9 and think ACA just used it as a means to slam 7. I’m sure it was a great side effect that 9 could slam 7, but let’s face it, 7 deserves to be slammed…. However, what people don’t realize is there was much more to the story than just a dig at another network. People at ACA knew what was happening. They had heard accounts of abuse, and wanted to bring the story to light. They didn’t just cover the story, then disappear until it was over. They’ve stayed in touch over the years. (Unlike so many others) They were genuinely vested in the story. Ben McCormack was in court during the verdict, and called so I could hear it straight from him, while he was there.
I’ve got nothing but love and respect for the whole ACA team. In this episode, chronicling the journey of the last 4 years, they’re not grandstanding or gloating. They are genuinely happy and proud of what ACA has done. They’ve helped me find my courage and strength to bring my perpetrator to court, where he was found guilty. That’s a wonderful thing.
If you can watch this, and think that ACA is only about ratings, and not about justice, then it says a lot more about you than it does about them…
A Current Affair – A Predators Downfall
I think they deserve a medal for their work. Hopefully, they’re remembered at award season. 😉
Well, it’s been a very long time coming, but the jury has found Robert guilty on 10 counts.
It’s been a very difficult few years, and the trial was very emotionally draining. I started on Friday afternoon and finished on Wednesday afternoon on the stand. Even though I only had the one charge, I guess his lawyer focused on me, since I was the one who brought the situation public. In the end, it was worth it, because now he’s in prison, awaiting his sentencing.
I’d like to take a moment to thank everyone involved in the case. The members of Strike Force Ruskin, the DPPs office, the wonderful women who volunteer their time at the VWCCS. I’d like to thank the jury who really paid attention during the case, and asked questions, before making a decision.
I want to thank Ben and Simone for backing me up. I know the last four years have been hard for you, and now that it’s over, I hope the industry rewards you for being good people. Also to the other cast and crew who took the stand to give evidence.
I’d like to thank Steve Jackson and Woman’s Day for doing the original article, and I’m forever grateful to Tracy Grimshaw and Ben McCormack for all your investigative journalism and keeping with the story for four years. Also to all the production team, who worked so hard behind the scenes.
I know that my case was not unique; there are others out there in the industry who have been affected, and other predators are being protected. Hopefully though, now more people will have the courage to speak up. Don’t stay silent. You never know how many other people are in the same situation, and you also don’t know how many have already been to the police.
It’s been a long hard journey, but in the end, it was worth it.
It was announced yesterday that Kylie Minogue and Will.i.am will be joining The Voice Australia, and that Delta Goodrem and Joel Madden will be working on The Voice Kids. Not sure who else will be on the kids version yet, but I sincerely hope they’re picking people who are good with kids. Even better if they pick people who were actually famous as kids, and can understand what the kids are going through.
The adult version of The Voice is going to be cut throat this year. The networks are going to put Kylie and Dannii against each other on rival singing shows. I can only imagine how ugly it’s going to get.
So what does that mean for The Kids version? Will it play nicely? Will they really push the kids to be even more entertaining? Do we even need a kids version?
I get that if there’s a bunch of kids who want to be part of The Voice, it’s better that they have their own version. It’s not fair to put kids against adults. In the acting world, you wouldn’t send a kid in to audition for the same part as an adult. But singing isn’t really a competition for the same part. Each person is recognized for their own talent. But on these shows, you just can’t compare an 8 year old with a 28 year old.
The Voice Kids has stated that they’ve got a team of clinical psychologists on board. Co-executive producer Geraldine Orrock told The Sunday Times “layers” of protection had been set up for the talented youngsters who made it to the Channel 9 set.
“We have a whole team of clinical psychologists who will be there to deal with anything that comes up at all times,” she said.
“The children will have their own guardian with them at all times. And we are hiring the right people, who have worked with kids before.”
Given how much has come out over the last couple of years about kids in the entertainment industry, let’s hope they’re really being careful about who they have working with kids. I hope they are doing background checks on everyone, and making sure the parents really are with the kids at all times. My mother was on set with me at the beginning, but then she would drop me off and pick me up. When I turned 12, and broke my leg, I started getting a taxi to work. I was driven home by a crew member. The only time she was there was on Saturday night. I hope the parents on The Voice Kids don’t get lax, and start thinking they don’t need to be there. It’s going to be very emotionally grueling. There’s going to be lots of ups and downs. The kids are going to need their parents there for them.
I also hope that the producers are watching out for Stage Parents. There’s nothing worse than a talented kid who is only there because the parents are pushing them, living vicariously through them. Or who see their kids as a meal ticket. Or who are not supportive. Are are generally just shitty people. There are shitty parents everywhere, but their shittyness just gets magnified on a set.
The kids, who so far have been watching The Voice, and who just see an hour of glamour, probably don’t realize just how much work goes into producing an hour of television. I doubt the parents have any idea either. They also won’t understand how much their lives will change. There’s all these articles in the paper lately along the lines of “What it’s like to be Asian/black/whatever in Australia”. Someone needs to do an article on what it’s like to be an entertainer in Australia. Especially a child entertainer. EVERYBODY is teased as a kid. We all get picked on for somehow being different. But it is much bigger when you’re on TV. These kids need to expect for everything to change. Kids at school will either think they’re awesome, or they’re going to beat the shit out of them. They’ll probably go through periods of both. It’s one thing in the US where there are literally hundreds of TV channels. People may never see The Voice, and nobody will recognize the kids. But in Australia, everyone will know their faces. It will be hard for them to go out and not feel the effects.
Fame is a weird thing. It changes people, and not just the person who becomes famous. It changes the people around you. Friends get weirded out by the experience. Some don’t want to be around you when you’re being followed by photographers. Others, who didn’t like you before, will suddenly find you fascinating. It’s hard for kids to work out who their real friends are, and who is just a hanger on.
Even if the kids make it through the whole thing, dealing with the ups, downs, cuts each week, what happens at the end? Are they going to be offered a deal like the adults? Will they be turned into mini record moguls, like Justin Beiber, or Miley Cyrus? (Will they end up like Beiber and Cyrus?) Will they be given a taste of fame, and then when the season is over, the networks just return them to suburbia where they came from, and the kids are expected to work out how to go back to normal?
I think, given the right environment, and the right people, The Voice Kids could be a good experience for kids who are serious about becoming singers as adults. I don’t think it’s a good place for sensitive kids who aren’t good at rejection, or who have spent their life being told they’re the most awesome kid on earth. I don’t think kids today can handle rejection well, although it might be a good life lesson for some of them. But my main concern is that it’s not show play, it’s not show fun, it’s show business. Business means work, and I’m not sure if everyone understands that it really is going to be WORK.
I’ll be keeping an eye on the show. It’ll be interesting to see how they handle it.
What’s the first thing you ask someone who you want to accuse of being an alcoholic? You ask them if they’re an alcoholic, so when they say no, you can say that denial is the first symptom. But what if they’re NOT an alcoholic? It doesn’t matter, because no matter what they say, you’ve already discredited them.
So if you want to attack an institution, why not find people who will claim there’s talk of conspiracy theories and satanic abuse, so that when you ask people why they’re being discredited, if they then say that they think it’s part of a smear campaign, you can then attack them as being paranoid. You can discredit someone even further, while they try to defend themselves. Their only option is NOT to defend themselves. Then people will also claim if they’re not defending themselves, it must be true. It’s quite brilliant manipulation really.
Last night, the 7:30 Report did a piece about Heal For Life. While admitting that they have an excellent track record of healing visitors, (which is 90%) they then went on to show a bunch of past volunteers and facilitators who were unhappy about their experiences while working at Heal For Life. Several newspapers have also grabbed on to the story this morning.
I attended a healing week at Heal For Life. It was an amazing experience. I learnt more about myself in one week at Heal For Life, and came home happier, and more at peace with myself than any other experience I’ve had on my long road to healing. While I was there, there was no discussion of satanic abuse. It was never suggested to me that I was a victim of satanic abuse. I never heard anyone else discuss it either. The first day I was there, we signed a statement saying we would not engage in self harm, and could be sent home if we did. There was a strict rule about no alcohol or drugs on the premises. There was also a strict rule about no touching, (although you could ask someone if they wanted to share a hug, and they could say no) and definitely no sex at the facility, even if it was consensual. We were told if anyone was found being intimate, they would be sent home. If one of the carers was having “consensual sex” with the attendees, as stated in the report, I can fully understand him being terminated. People are vulnerable, and open. It’s not the time to be having sex, while you’re dealing with sex abuse.
No matter where you go, if you find any place of employment, volunteer organization, even a church, you’re going to be able to find people who are disgruntled and who will talk bad about it. I’ve had several jobs that if you asked me, I could state reasons the place sucked. It doesn’t mean it’s true, but that’s my opinion. While volunteering with the Boy Scouts, we went on a trip to Mexico. It was right as the shit was hitting the fan down there. I’m surprised we were allowed to go. I didn’t think a lot of the things we did on the trip were safe. It was a caving trip, and we were inside a mammoth cave far from medical help. We had a bunch of youth with us. If anything had gone wrong, people could have died. But here’s the thing about being a volunteer. If you don’t like it, you can stop doing it. Which is what I did. After that trip, I stopped volunteering with the scouts. I hated the caving trips, it meant it wasn’t fun anymore because that’s all we did, so I just stopped doing it. I’ve also had jobs I hated, so I left.
If volunteers at Heal For Life felt burnt out, they could have stopped. They could have said, “Hey, I need a break for a while.” It’s OK to take a time out. In fact, one of the biggest lessons I learnt at Heal For Life was that it’s OK to say NO. It’s OK to make yourself number one. I have no doubt that being a carer or facilitator at Heal For Life is stressful. We were told not to go into detail of our own abuse with other attendees, because of transference. I can understand this because after I publicly told my story, I had hundreds of people email me, call me, or tell me their stories in person. Most days I was glad people felt like they could share with me, but other days it can be highly depressing. Some of the things I heard at Heal For Life were very sad, and I’m sure that hearing those things frequently can be very disheartening. But I also heard from the carers that they switched out frequently, to avoid being burnt out.
At the end of the week, we were given information on people who attended several healing weeks who went on to become carers. I wouldn’t say they were “recruiting” people. We knew that all carers were past attendees, and that there was an opportunity to become a carer if we desired it. Part of what makes Heal For Life unique is that it is staffed by past attendees. People who understand what you’re going through. Too many people have been to see a counselor or psychiatrist and had no success because they feel like the shrink is just sitting there doodling and not even listening. They just look up occasionally, say “and how does that make you feel?” and then tell you they’ll see you again next week. When you go to Heal For Life, you’re surrounded by people who understand what you’re going through. Nobody would dare pat you on the back and say “There, There, it’s all better now. Get over it and move along with your life.” But if a carer feels like it’s too much for them, it’s up to them to take a time out, and say that they can’t deal with it, and have somebody else step in. If you don’t think you’re trained enough to help others, then don’t.
I question the motives of the report on Heal For Life. If they can admit they have a great success rate with attendees, why are they doing a report on the staff, and the management. It looks very much like a smear campaign against Liz Mullinar. She can’t come out and defend herself at this stage, because if she does, the media will claim she’s paranoid. They’ve got some unhappy formers staff to say she’s paranoid, and if she now says people are trying to discredit her, it’s like fulfilling the prophecy. The whole report came off as people pointing a finger at Liz.
We’re in the middle of a Royal Commission. There’s a lot of unhappy people in high places that are looking to discredit anyone and everyone who might say something against them. There’s also the fact that Liz Mullinar was actually the casting director on Hey Dad..! She’s widely known in the entertainment industry, and there are many more actors like me who have experienced abuse in the industry. Several actors have been through the program at Heal For Life. If anyone was ready to speak out the way I have, I wouldn’t put it past some of the perpetrators to try to discredit Liz, in an attempt to discredit the victims. There has always been rumours of groups of people in the industry, who were cult like, or involved in satanic rituals*. If any of those victims were getting ready to speak out, their defense would be that Liz planted those ideas in their heads. That she helped make it up. Their cases would be thrown out, because they’ve already discredited Liz. For the record, I don’t know if any of the rumours are true, I just know they exist.
We’ve already seen how many cases have been swept under the rug in Australia. How many cases have been ignored. How many cases had nothing done till somebody went public. (Not just me). We’re also seeing lots of high profile people, including judges and magistrates, who are themselves being arrested for sexual assault against children. Victims are starting to talk. These people who thought that they were protected are starting to feel the heat. They’re worried their little worlds are going to crumble. I have no doubt that the people in power, who are very high up in society, who have been getting away with it for years, would stoop to levels of discrediting someone who is helping victims, if they thought it meant they could save their own asses.
So I just have to wonder why the ABC chose to go hunting to find past carers of Heal For Life. Why did they do the story? Whose idea was it? How much coercing was involved in getting these people on air? Did the carers approach the ABC, or did the ABC go looking for the story? Does Media Watch ever investigate stories on the ABC, or just from the commercial networks? What’s the point of this investigation? Are there genuine concerns about Heal For Life, or is this just a witch hunt against Liz personally?
Liz may not be able to ask these question herself, because they’ve already set the grounds for her to be paranoid about organizations trying to discredit her, but I can. Liz wasn’t at my healing week, and I haven’t seen her in person since about 1995. I had just returned from Honduras, and was at an audition, and she asked me straight up if I had ever been touched on set. I was terrified of answering her honestly, so I just told her my mum said if I couldn’t say anything nice, not to say anything at all. I didn’t know that she knew the truth, and had helped in finding replacements on the show because of it. I always wish I had been strong enough back then to tell her the truth. Things may have turned out much differently for all of us.
Alas, the past is the past, and all I can do is focus on the upcoming trial. I know that Liz will be there for me if I need her to be. I just hope that Heal For Life will also be there if I need it.
*I’m not linking to it, because of defamation idiots in Australia, but Google “the paedophile and satanic network in Australia” I have no idea if this is true or not, but there are rumours and innuendos out there that it does exist, and it involves some very interesting people.I’ve not had the privilege of meeting Charlotte Dawson in person, but we’ve communicated over social media, and I love her because she has been supportive of me and my journey over the last 3+ years. She has sent me messages off line, giving me a much needed boost when I was feeling low. I admire the fact that she’s so open, and that she’s not afraid to tell people who she really is. I think she’s beautiful and ballsy. That’s a rare combination.
It’s hard to find real people in the entertainment business. Everyone is always just a carefully crafted image. The audience knows this, and are always begging to see the real side of stars. That’s why people love Celebrity Reality shows, because you finally get to see some real personality shine through. It’s also why so many celebs don’t do reality. Because their REAL personality is carefully hidden, lest it hurt “their brand”.
People like Charlotte let others know it’s OK to be vulnerable. That we all have emotions. That we all have bad days. She shows that celebs have feelings too, and if you constantly tell us we’re worthless, that it affects us too, just like anybody else. I thinks she’s tremendously courageous for tweeting out when she needs help. I love that she posts random photos on instagram. I love that she lets us see the real her, and not just the carefully crafted glamour shots of her.
So reading that her management company is telling her they can’t represent her because she’s damaging her brand by being too real just saddens me. It tells me her company, and that of the people using her services are just completely out of touch with reality. We don’t want carefully crafted fake personalities. We want real people like Charlotte. We want people that we can relate to. People who show us that they’re human.
Shame on you Chic Celebrity Management.
Don’t worry Charlotte, you’ll find something better.
Well, it’s finally Halloween here in the US. I love Halloween. Everybody dresses up and parties. Communities get together and decorate, and kids get to go out and meet their neighbours. I wish I was at home instead of out of town for work, because people in my area go nuts. They decorate elaborately for weeks, and set up mini theme parks in their garages.
The grown up all have dress up parties, and try to outdo each other in the outfits. People make cute themed food and drinks, and there’s lots of fun and excitement.
When I was a kid in Australia, I so wished we had Halloween the way the Americans do. It seemed like such a fun event. I was so happy when I got here and found out it really was, and wasn’t just something made big for TV. Sure, it’s very commercialized, with everyone buying candy and decorations. But really, it’s not as bad as Xmas, or Easter, and there’s no family drama.
So to all my Aussie friends, I hope those of you who chose to get in on the fun and dress up had a great time, and to all my friends here, can’t wait to see you when I get home tonight. Still not sure what I’m going to be yet…. Maybe I’ll just leave my uniform on and go as GI Jane. 😉